For a long time, gay men seemed largely uninterested in the concept. While lesbians would, and did, discuss the matter at length - the general consensus seemed to be that marriage was nothing to emulate. All queer folk grow up with connections to the straight world. The majority of us keep at least some of them.  From the outside of a fish bowl one often has a unique view.

Queer folk listened to the at times hysterical media discussions of how societal morals are faltering and how, supposedly as a result, the divorce rate continues to climb.  Being persons with very little anticipation of ever being allowed to partake in an ancient institution allowed lesbians to dissect said institution with no investment to loose.

I was completely uninterested.  I'd studied enough: anthropology, history, social science and religion to be able to conclude that the institution of marriage was a purely economic one, largely concerned with breeding offspring and the legitimacy thereof, as related to males.   Almost inevitably marriage was an arrangement skewed against women.

This take on marriage I maintained until near the beginning of the new millennium.  Slowly, gradually, more and more queer-folk (primarily gay men) began to take interest in marriage.   It began to be seen as a civil/equal rights issue.

And because queer -folk tend to make much of our being members of a similar-enough community, I decided I had to take another look. If enough community members consider an issue to be important then one must at least consider or reconsider. It didn't matter wheather I wanted or intended to exploit this potential new right.  What mattered was that members of a community I belonged to wanted this now-perceived right.

I have come to the conclusion that opposition to queer marriage comes in two closely related camps.   One - those people who object based on religious grounds.   To them I say: If we are to pay more than lip service to our supposed separation of Church and State then you must cease objecting outside of houses of worship. The second camp is made up of those who have come to the conclusion that queer-folk are somehow less human than straight-folk. Historically the US has often restricted access to marriage.  

Colored-folk were once legally considered inherently lesser beings (3/5 of human), unable to marry colorless-folk.  In many states epileptics couldn't get married until just two or three generations ago. This history is one many Americans would deplore.  It is in light of our past that we need to see the Equal Marriage movement as a civil rights issue.